I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
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remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
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I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
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