dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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