Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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