Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
