I am puke
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
