My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
