woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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