the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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