id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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