is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
