We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
