please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
A bitchslap is in order.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
