I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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