I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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