So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
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She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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