wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
