Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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