Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Shame - the story of my life.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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