lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
