They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize