You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
