You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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