But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
