So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
