Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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