He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
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