But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
