great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
