Why does Corona taste like a burp?
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize