she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
