you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize