I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
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there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
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I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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