I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
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