we're blogging at a bar
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize