can u get pink eye on your cock?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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