o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
It was confusing and full of hummus
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
