they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize