Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
she looked like the before picture.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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