i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
