living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.