How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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