im holly from the hills drunk
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
My dick has a subreddit
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Pants are for mortals
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
