we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
