I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.