I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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