I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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