Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
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Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
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I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
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