I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize