yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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