Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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